Download Cash Out: A Novel by Greg Bardsley PDF

By Greg Bardsley

It's 2008. In 3 days, kinfolk guy and Silicon Valley speechwriter Dan Jordan will see his start-up inventory vest. He'll funds out with $1.1 million, flip in his frenetic Valley existence in for a slower one at the seashore along with his spouse and little ones, and eventually stay the existence he's purported to reside. Or so he thinks. ahead of he can acquire his funds and get outta avoid, all hell breaks unfastened. Dan is abducted by way of a gang of tiny IT nerds who threaten to get him fired earlier than the choices can vest, stalked by means of a most likely murderous company safety muscle guy, and faced with the potential disintegration of his marriage, all whereas his sociopath neighbor, loopy Larry, threatens to smash every thing. . . .

Side-splittingly humorous and entire of larger-than-life characters, Cash Out is like Office Space as reimagined by means of the creators of The Hangover--a sly caper long gone outrageously, unforgettably awry.

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I begged him to get rid of the python. ” Captain Thomas Kelly, from the Forty-sixth Precinct, said: “It looks accidental. Grant may have suspected that his familiarity with Damien placed him above danger, but a hungry python does Reptiles are cold blooded and have a slow metabolism. ” right for a snake this size. ConDamien was fed and strictors kill their prey by suffocacaged at an animal control tion, and the more the prey struggles, the more tightly they center, where he awaited grasp it with coils and jaws.

I was shocked to see two young men weaving about in front of a tiger with garlands in their hands,” said witness Rakesh Banerjee. “I saw it all. ” Reference: Kunal Sen Gupta, Calcutta, India NATURAL SELECTION: ANIMAL MISADVENTURES 27 DARWIN AWARD: HUNGRY PYTHON KILLS OWNERS Confirmed by Darwin 11 OCTOBER 1996, NEW YORK If you let a twelve-foot python roam free in your home, you stand a good chance of qualifying for a Darwin Award. A man was crushed to death by his pet python after failing to keep the snake properly satiated with food.

NATURAL SELECTION: ANIMAL MISADVENTURES 49 My friend was laughing his ass off as he handed me the aerosol can I had dropped in my haste. He shone his flashlight on its label. That industrial-strength bug repellent was so powerful, it would probably have driven off hungry alligators! It was Easy-OFF oven cleaner. The skin on my thighs eventually sloughed off and healed. Despite this incident, hunting for snakes has been a lifelong passion. Reference: Bill Love, personal account.

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